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Why Transitions Are So Hard for Autistic Kids (and What Helps)

Darian Shipman

From a BCBA Who Truly Gets It

If you’ve ever tried to move your autistic child from one activity to another and been met with a meltdown, refusal, or sudden silence—you’re not alone. As a Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA) who supports families like yours every day, I want you to know: transitions are one of the most common challenges I see, and there are clear reasons why they can be so tough.

Let’s break it down together—why transitions can be overwhelming, and more importantly, what actually helps.

Why Are Transitions So Difficult?

1. It’s Not Just “Bad Behavior” — It’s Neurological

Autistic children often experience differences in executive functioning, the brain’s ability to plan, shift attention, and regulate emotions. These differences can make it much harder to stop one activity and start another (Mastermind Behavior, n.d.).

➤ Imagine trying to leave a joyful activity without knowing what’s coming next—that uncertainty alone can feel disorienting, especially for a child who thrives on structure.

2. They Crave Predictability

Many autistic children find comfort in sameness and routine. Sudden or unexpected changes can cause anxiety and resistance—not because your child is being defiant, but because their brain craves predictability and order (Child Mind Institute, 2022).

3. Sensory Overload Adds Another Layer

Transitions often involve moving between environments with different sounds, lights, or textures. For children with sensory sensitivities, this can be jarring and even painful (National Autistic Society, 2024).

➤ For example, going from a quiet therapy room to a noisy lunchroom may feel overwhelming and trigger a shutdown or meltdown.

4. Communication Difficulties Make It Hard to Cope

If your child struggles to express their feelings, needs, or confusion, they may use behavior to communicate instead. What may look like “misbehavior” is often a form of communication (National Institute on Deafness and Other Communication Disorders, 2023).

What Actually Helps?

Here’s the good news: transitions can become easier. It’s not about achieving perfect behavior—it’s about building trust, support, and predictability.

✅ Prepare in Advance

Give your child a heads-up when a transition is coming. Use simple language like “In 5 minutes, it’s time to clean up,” and set a timer so they can see time pass.

✅ Use Visual Supports

Visuals are one of the most effective tools for helping autistic children manage transitions (Rising Above ABA, n.d.). Visual schedules, first-then boards, and routine cards make the day feel more predictable.

✅ Establish Consistent Routines

Kids thrive on knowing what comes next. Keeping daily transitions as predictable as possible helps reduce anxiety over time. (Indiana Institute on Disability and Community, n.d.)

✅ Offer Positive Reinforcement

Celebrate the wins, even the small ones! Reinforcing smooth transitions with praise or a preferred item/activity teaches your child that change can feel safe and even rewarding.

✅ Stay Calm and Supportive

Even on hard days, your calmness models regulation and trust. When transitions fall apart—and sometimes they will—responding with empathy matters more than perfection.

You’re Not Alone in This

Transitions can be tough, even for adults. For our autistic children, they often require extra support, time, and understanding. And that’s okay. Progress comes in small, steady steps.

Your love, your effort, and your consistency are powerful. You’re already doing the hard work—and I’m here to support you every step of the way.

Warmly,
Darian Shipman, MS, BCBA, LBA
 Founder of The ABA Parent Page

References

Vanderbilt Kennedy Center. (n.d.). Visual supports for routines, schedules, and transitions. Retrieved from https://vkc.vumc.org/assets/files/resources/visualsupports.pdf

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