Our family wants to have a Fourth of July barbeque, but I’m just worried about how my son will manage that day.
These feelings are valid.
It’s tough when you want to be involved with others, including family events, but have the constant worry of what about my son?
Will he be fine with all the changes?
Are the fireworks going to be too much?
What if someone upsets him?
My uncle just doesn’t seem to understand that my son has different needs and him being around stresses me out.
All of these thoughts and feelings are valid.
The Fourth of July is a time of celebration, fireworks, parades, and family gatherings. For many, it’s a highlight of the summer. However, for children with autism, the loud noises, bright lights, and unpredictable nature of the festivities can be overwhelming.
Preparing your autistic child for the Fourth of July celebrations can help make the day more enjoyable for everyone involved. Here’s a comprehensive guide to help you navigate this holiday with your autistic child.
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Understand the Challenges
Sensory Sensitivities
Autistic children often have heightened sensory sensitivities. The loud booms of fireworks, the flashing lights, and even the hustle and bustle of crowds can be overwhelming.
Understanding these sensitivities is the first step in preparing for the celebrations.
While being around friends and family can be fun, try and find time to ensure your child can get away from all the extra noises, smells, and people.
Changes in Routine
Autistic children typically thrive on routine. The Fourth of July often involves a break from the usual schedule, which can be distressing.
Preparing for these changes in advance can help mitigate anxiety.
Prepare in Advance
Gradual Exposure
Gradual exposure to the elements of the Fourth of July can help your child become more comfortable. For example, you can show videos of fireworks and parades to familiarize them with the sights and sounds they will experience. Start with low volumes and gradually increase them.
You can also try going to places that are usually a little more crowded, like the playground, to become familiar with larger amounts of people around. This would also be a good time to practice safety and staying with an adult.
Social Stories
Social stories are a great way to prepare autistic children for new experiences. Create a story that outlines what will happen on the Fourth of July, including any specific events you plan to attend. Include pictures and simple descriptions to help your child understand what to expect.
Prepping with social stories can aid in assisting with learning and understanding what to expect. You can even include a section about what to do and who to talk to if they start to feel overwhelmed.
Visual Schedules
A visual schedule can help your child understand the plan for the day. Use pictures or symbols to represent each part of the day’s activities. This can reduce anxiety by providing a clear structure.
If you’re short on time, and your child can read, you can also opt for text schedules. This could be done on a laminated sheet of paper, cardstock paper, or any other material they like that can be written on. You would simply write out each event that will occur, rather than making pictures.
Create a Sensory-Friendly Environment
Noise-Canceling Headphones
Noise-canceling headphones can be a lifesaver during loud events. They help reduce the impact of loud noises, making the environment more tolerable for your child. Make sure your child is comfortable with the headphones before the event.
This may also need some gradual exposure. Depending on the headphones used, they may take some time to get used to.
Comfortable Clothing
Dress your child in comfortable, familiar clothing. Avoid anything new or scratchy that could add to their discomfort. Consider bringing a favorite blanket or stuffed animal for added comfort.
Also consider bringing an extra set, or two, of clothes for changing. Remember, there may be other kids or open food available. This could lead to a mess or two.
Safe Space
Identify a quiet, safe space where your child can retreat if they become overwhelmed. This could be a room in your home, a quiet spot at a relative’s house, or even a comfortable area in your car.
Also, ensure that your child knows how to let you know when they need to go to the safe space. The last thing you want is to be panicked if your kid is not in sight!
Plan for the Day
Start Early
Start your preparations early in the day to avoid last-minute stress. This includes packing any necessary items, such as headphones, snacks, and comfort objects.
You may want to also review the plans for the day. Giving a sense of knowing and readiness will give the best chance at smooth transitions throughout the day.
Avoid Crowded Areas
If possible, avoid the most crowded areas. Look for events that are less crowded or have designated sensory-friendly zones. Alternatively, you could watch fireworks from a distance or participate in smaller, local celebrations.
Keep It Short
It’s okay to keep the celebration short. Pay attention to your child’s cues and leave before they become overwhelmed. It’s better to have a short, positive experience than a long, stressful one.
It’s better to leave early and form positive experiences than to spend 30-plus minutes attempting to leave after your child is overstimulated, upset, and potentially having a meltdown.
During the Celebration
Communication
Keep communication open with your child throughout the day. Use simple, clear language to explain what’s happening and what will happen next. Reassure them that they can take breaks whenever they need to.
Use Fidget Toys
Fidget toys can provide a calming distraction for your child. Bring along a variety of fidget toys that your child enjoys and use them as needed.
Refer to the Schedule
Be sure to have that visual or text schedule on hand. After each event ends, refer back to the schedule to talk about what will happen next.
After the Celebration
Maintain Routine
Try to return to your child’s normal routine as quickly as possible. This can help them feel more secure and reduce any lingering anxiety.
This can include at the end of the day, doing the nighttime routine to bring back a sense of routine and security for your child.
Celebrate the Small Wins
Celebrate any small wins from the day, no matter how minor they may seem. Acknowledge your child’s efforts and resilience.
Talk positively! Refrain from talking about what went wrong, or how they could do better next time. This isn’t the time to talk negatively. Keeping it positive will encourage your child to do more activities and trust that you’ll support them!
Additional Tips and Considerations
Involve Your Child in Planning
Involve your child in the planning process as much as possible. Let them choose which events they want to attend or which comfort items they want to bring. This can give them a sense of control and reduce anxiety.
Not everything has to be set in stone. Provide a choice whenever possible. For example, when deciding what clothes to wear, give at least two shirts, pants, and shoe options. It won’t matter what they pick, just that their voice matters.
Educate Others
Educate family members and friends about your child’s needs and how they can help. This can ensure that everyone is on the same page and can provide support when needed.
It’s ok to step in and tell a family member or friend what your child needs. You know your child best and have their best interest at heart. Not everyone understands and so you can offer to educate or inform them.
Sometimes people just don’t understand why your child may need a visual schedule, and that’s ok. But don’t let them override your child’s needs either.
Consider Alternatives
If traditional celebrations are too overwhelming, consider alternative ways to celebrate. This could include a quiet family picnic, watching fireworks on TV, or creating your own sensory-friendly celebration at home.
You don’t always have to be out and about during celebrations. Sometimes that familiarity of home is the best place.
It’s like Dorothy Gale said in The Wizard of Oz, “There’s no place like home.”
Practice Relaxation Techniques
Teach your child relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing or using a weighted blanket. Practice these techniques in advance so they are familiar with them if they need to use them during the celebration.
It’s best to practice these relaxation techniques before events. In the moment is not typically the best time to work on these techniques.
Conclusion
Preparing your autistic child for the Fourth of July celebrations requires careful planning and consideration. By understanding their unique challenges and implementing strategies to address them, you can create a more enjoyable and inclusive experience.
Remember, it’s okay to adapt traditions to fit your child’s needs. The most important thing is that your child feels safe, comfortable, and included.
If you like what you read here, there are more informative posts on our page, there is more information about ABA, and how to use it in the home. Subscribe here to be in the know and be notified about new posts!
Take a deep breath. You’ve got this!
Happy Fourth of July!